


call me home

by Huffleton_Puffleton



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:00:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23227483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huffleton_Puffleton/pseuds/Huffleton_Puffleton
Summary: You’re an ex-child star, now professional model. Ushijima is the professional volleyball player you get paired with for an ad campaign. Somehow, you convince him to simply let the paparazzi spread dating rumors for publicity. What could possibly go wrong?playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3uBbRJgI8QeOpa1zQkJN0p?si=Cxx3XusiQbujiR28DF0gTwalso on tumblr (icyhotvolleyboys)
Relationships: Ushijima Wakatoshi/Reader
Comments: 36
Kudos: 88





	1. Chapter One

Ushijima smiled up at the girl he was holding aloft. You beamed down at him, smile soft and glowing.

_Click!_

“Alright, one more!”

_Click!_

“Okay, let’s take a break!” The photographer yelled. Your face dropped into a frown as Ushijima set you down gently.

“Ushijima, you need to smile when you’re doing that. You’re making me look heavy.”

“I was smiling.” Ushijima responded, confused.

“Okay, so you need to smile _wider_. They’re shooting from the side, so if you don’t, it’ll look like you’re having a hard time lifting me.”

“Alright, I’ll do my best.” He said. You nodded and strode off.

Ushijima Wakatoshi was not the ideal partner for an ad campaign. He was a total amateur, and couldn’t even emote to the camera. He wasn’t even a professional model, but this was a sportswear ad and he was a professional athlete. You tried not to let him affect your work, but it was like modeling with a brick wall! Actually, you’d done that before, and even the brick wall was easier to work with.

Steaming, you took calming breaths as you walked towards your seat and grabbed a bottle of water. You didn’t want to think about it too much, but the real reason you were so cranky that day was because of your mom. You were an adult, for crying out loud, but she managed your career, so what could you do? This time, she was not-so-subtly hinting for you to get a boyfriend again. You’d been single for a while now, which translated to prime opportunity for free publicity. She’d been sending you photos of other celebrities she’d approved. 

“What’re you watching these days?” You asked your PA. Naoko was closer to your age, and often sympathetic, but your mom paid her salary, so she wasn’t exactly a friend. Close enough, though, you often thought. She was always busy handling your schedule, and Naoko’s only respite was streaming dramas.

“Here,” Naoko showed you a scene playing out on her phone. “The main character’s dating this guy, but her first love just returned from abroad.” You watched the episode with her.

After a while, you turned to Naoko. “Oh, he’s gonna get into a car accident!” As soon as you said that, the main character’s boyfriend’s car was rammed by a truck.

“Stop predicting things!” Naoko chastised. It was a running joke between the two of you that you could easily predict the plot twists of any drama Naoko watched. It was true, though. You’d given up on them a long time ago, because they were starting to get boring. It wasn’t fun knowing exactly how things would go.

“How did you do that?” You and Naoko jumped. She scrambled to pause the episode. Ushijima stood behind you.

“Do what?” You asked.

“How did you know he’d get in a car crash?”

“It’s a popular drama trope.” You shrugged.

“Oh, that’s (y/n)’s special talent! Not just dramas, too, she can predict the plots on most things, books, movies, shows…” Naoko trailed off under Ushijima’s stare.

“How?”

“I watch too much stuff,” you said, “it’s just a matter of recognizing the pattern.” You eyed him carefully. He stared you down unnervingly.

“Okay.” Ushijima nodded and walked off.

“He’s so weird.” You tell Naoko.

“Break’s over!” Someone yelled, as a bell rang, signaling it was time to start shooting again. A hairdresser and makeup artist rushed to you as you got up. You tried to stay perfectly still as they poked and prodded, powdered and reapplied lipstick. You could never shake the uncomfortable feeling of being nothing more than a doll.

“Have you ever played volleyball?” Ushijima asked as soon as you joined him in front of the camera and under the blazing lights.

“What?” You asked, surprised. “Not really? Maybe a little?” You maneuvered yourself as the photographer instructed. Ushijima didn’t ask any more.

“Okay, why don’t we try something like this?” The photographer had Ushijima sit down, and you allowed him to drape you provocatively across Ushijima’s lap. You wanted to roll your eyes at how this pose had nothing to do with sportswear, but you were a professional, after all. You were used to this. You noticed the tips of Ushijima’s ears were pink. Amateur, you thought to yourself, but you couldn’t deny it was endearing. He was a rarity in your line of work.

There was one thing that made Ushijima bearable to work with. He was always respectful of you and your space. You’d been modeling for so long, that you weren’t used to someone asking if you were comfortable with a particular pose, but he asked every time. He asked permission to touch you. He took your lead. You weren’t used to it, and you told yourself you _shouldn’t_ get used to it.

As soon as they’d taken enough shots, Ushijima guided you up gently. You saw his hesitant face and had to hold back a laugh. “I’m fine.” You could’ve sworn he’d blushed just then.

* * *

Ushijima was waiting for you outside your changing room. He held his phone out. “I wanted to try something.”

“What?” You asked.

“Can you try to predict this?” He showed you his phone screen. There was a video of a volleyball game paused.

“Uuuuhhhh…I don’t know what you mean.”

“Can you try to predict where the ball will go?”

“Ushijima, I told you. I don’t play volleyball.”

“But it’s just a matter of recognizing the pattern, right?” Ushijima had not meant it to sound like a challenge, and you knew that, but you took it as one anyway. Besides, you were curious, and you hadn’t been curious about anything in so long.

“Okay.” You grabbed a few chairs no one had put away yet, and shooed Naoko away before she could tell you what was next on your schedule. Ushijima hit play and watched with you. You both sat in still silence for a long time. You didn’t know much about the rules of the sport, but you knew the general idea. 

Finally, you paused the video just as one team was about to spike. “It’s going in this area.” You drew a circle in the air over a spot on the phone. 

Sure enough, when you hit play, the ball sailed into the same spot. The opposite team received it, and as the ball sailed towards the setter (not that you knew what a setter was), you hit pause again. “This guy’s gonna pass it over to this guy, and he’s gonna hit into this part of the court.”

You pointed to the setter, then to one of the players gearing up to hit the toss, then a spot on the other side of the net. “That’s the setter.” Ushijima responded. He’d thought your first guess was a fluke, but this next one was too specific to be a random guess. Once again, your prediction came true.

“How can you tell?” Ushijima asked.

“I already told you: patterns. Besides, that one guy was way too obvious about wanting to hit the ball. He extends his dominant arm a bit more when he’s about to hit. He’s not as tense when he’s just faking it.” Ushijima only nodded.

“Can you teach me?”

“What?! Aren’t you a professional volleyball player?” You stood up. 

“Yes, and it’s important to take every opportunity to cultivate oneself.” Ushijima seemed completely serious as he said this, and you snorted. He was definitely weird…and interesting.

“No, thank you.” You said. “I don’t have time.”

“That’s too bad.” Ushijima said. He seemed genuinely disappointed. “You have a useful talent. It would be a shame to waste it.”

“You don’t know that I’m wasting it.” You frowned.

“I don’t think it has much of an application in modeling.” His face was infuriatingly earnest.

“You don’t know anything about modeling.” You said icily.

“I may not be the best at it, but I’ve completed a few successful projects, so far.” He was right, and you knew it, and it wasn’t as though you were particularly crazy about your job either, but you were offended nonetheless.

“You’re an amateur at best.” He finally seemed to sense your sour mood.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you. I didn’t know-,” he stopped and tried to find the right words. “I didn’t think this was so important to you.”

“It’s not.” You spat. How did he manage to annoy you so much. He’d only said the truth. You took some calming breaths and plastered on a dazzling smile. “It’s good money.”

* * *

“She doesn’t answer when I call.” You complained to Naoko as both of you sped to your dermatologist appointment in the darkly tinted black van. It was big enough to serve as a trailer or changing room in between gigs.

“I’m sorry, but your mom has a big meeting scheduled for this hour, so I can’t call her.” Naoko said.

“She’ll answer if it’s you. She’ll think it’s work stuff.”

“I’m sure if you leave her a message-.” You cut her off.

“What? She’ll get back to me? I don’t need her to get back to me. I need her to listen. I don’t want to see anyone, right now. I like being single for once. Besides, she doesn’t even care if I like the guys she wants me to date or not, as long as they fit _The Image_.”

Naoko sighed and dropped the conversation. She knew you wouldn’t force her to do anything. You were often cranky and hardheaded, but there were worse people to work for. She let you sulk with your headphones on for the rest of the drive as she scrolled through her phone.

“Look, the campaign launched.” Naoko showed you her phone. It was the pictures from your first photoshoot with Ushijima. They would release the rest as the campaign progressed, but these were already gaining the usual load of likes and comments on Instagram.

You were barely paying attention until your eyes caught on a few comments. They were saying you had good chemistry, that you and Ushijima looked good together. You took Naoko’s phone and scrolled through some more comments. They said the same thing, whether they were your fans or Ushijima’s. An idea started to blossom in your mind. Before Naoko realized what was happening, you used her phone to dial your mom’s number.

“Mom?” It took a few rings but she finally picked up.

“(Y/n)?” She didn’t sound surprised.

“Ushijima Wakatoshi.” You said.

“Who?”

“Pro volleyball player. I did a sportswear ad campaign with him?”

“Oh, right! What about him? (Y/n), I don’t have much time.”

“Listen, the campaign just launched and people are already saying we look good together, and we have chemistry. I think he’s a good choice.” Naoko gave you a confused look.

There was a short silence, and you could hear people talking in the background. She was probably looking him up right then and there. “Are you sure? He’s not very popular outside of the sports scene.”

“Exactly. He fits the requirements: popular, but not more popular than me; good-looking, but not better-looking than me; he doesn’t have any scandals either. Plus, people already like us together.”

“Well, it’s your choice.” You wanted to laugh at that. It was like telling you to choose between an apple and an orange when you didn’t even want to eat.

“I choose him.”

“Okay, then. Make it happen.” Your mother said before hanging up.

You turned to Naoko, handing her the phone. “Do I have anything scheduled the day after tomorrow?”

“You have a free hour at 2.” She said, though she shot you a questioning look.

“Good. We’re paying the Schweiden Adlers a visit.”


	2. Chapter Two

Entering the Schweiden Adlers’ home court was not a problem for you. It turns out, even the security personnel were fans. Posing for selfies was no problem, after all, you  _ wanted  _ people to know you were there. 

“I’m sorry Ms. (y/l/n), but we’re in the middle of practice. I’m afraid Ushijima is still busy,” said the nervous assistant.

“No problem. I can wait right here.” You said, intentionally misunderstanding him. You strode over to a bench closer to the court amid his protests.

“You have an hour.” Naoko reminded you. “Well, more like half an hour now.”

“Could you just let him know I’m here? I know phones aren’t allowed at practice, so I can’t exactly tell him myself.” You smiled sweetly at the assistant. Ushijima was further down the court, and while some of his teammates were starting to notice the commotion, he was entirely focused on his drills.

The assistant seemed about to protest. “Yamamoto, was it? Wakatoshi is waiting for me, you know? It would be a shame if he found out that I came all this way but had to leave anyway, because no one let him know.” That got Yamamoto practically running to Ushijima, apologizing profusely as he went.

“You know, acting like a brat isn’t exactly good for your image.” Naoko said, distractedly working on her tablet.

“Everyone assumes I’m a brat already, Naoko. It hardly matters.” You watched Ushijima turn your way in surprise, and you waved amiably at him. His teammates and staff were  _ definitely  _ watching now. One of them slapped him on the back cheerily.

As you watched Ushijima jog your way, you couldn’t help but approve of your choice. He was tall and strong, well-proportioned in every way. He was handsome in a serious, quiet way that would not outshine you. This was something your mother always stressed. You had been a cute kid, precocious and funny enough for TV and films, but you had not grown into the typical model sort of beauty. You were cute. You were pretty. Often, you were even beautiful. But there would always be some younger, more attractive girl. It didn’t matter how good your dermatologist was, how careful you were with your skin, how much you dieted and worked out. There would always be someone more attractive. You had to be smarter, your mother said. You had to play this game better.

“(Y/l/n).” Ushijima greeted you. He gave Naoko an awkward greeting, not sure if she was paying attention or not.

“Ushijima,” you got up and walked closer to him, “How are you?”

“I’m doing well. Did you need something?” Ushijima asked. He was not impolite, but you could tell he wanted to go back to training.

“You’re so straightforward, as usual,” you laughed. You touched his arm, quick enough to be innocuous, but of course, you did it for the benefit of your audience. In the corner of your eye, you could see everyone trying not to watch.

“Oh, did you reconsider my request?” Ushijima asked. It had been a while since he asked you to teach him to read patterns. You were surprised he’d remembered.

“Actually, I wanted to ask if you wanted to go out some time. Like on a date?” You beamed confidently. He was in no position to turn you down.

“Oh,” Ushijima flushed and turned away awkwardly. “I’m honored…” he frowned and you felt an unfamiliar kernel of doubt. “But, I’m sorry, I’m just too busy to date right now. I’m focusing on my volleyball career-.”

“Wait.” You interrupted. “Are you turning me down?” You swore Naoko was holding back a smile.

“I’m really sorry.”

“Oh.” You turned red. You’d never been turned down before, at least not when asking someone out.

Ushijima watched you awkwardly, unsure what to do in this situation. He’d only ever received a confession once before, and though he’d turned that person down too, they didn’t exactly react this way. In fact, they’d run away crying. And here you were, looking more confused than upset. Add to that, your PA was standing nearby watching the whole thing.

“Oh, okay, but, what if…” your thoughts scrambled for a way to get him to say yes. 

_ Oh. _

“Yes?” Ushijima asked. You looked as though you’d just had an idea. He already had trouble reading most social interactions. You were truly confusing him.

“What if,” you said slowly, “I teach you to read patterns.”

“What?”

“You can make time for that, right? Since it’ll count as volleyball training?” You continued. Naoko looked as though she might stop you so you threw her a look.  _ Hold on. Just wait. _

“It will have to be a bit later in the evening…” Ushijima said. “But yes. I would be able to make time.”

“Good. Then, I just need something in exchange.”

“What is it?” Ushijima asked warily.

“Of course, rumors will spread that something is going on between us.” You paused, but Ushijima only listened. “Let them. Don’t deny the rumors. Let people think we’re dating.”

“What?” Ushijima and Naoko said at the same time.

“Listen,” you addressed Ushijima. “I just need my mother off my back, okay? And if dating rumors spread? Well, that’s just the kind of free publicity that would keep her quiet.”

“You want people to think we’re dating? Because of your mother?”

You ignored the last question. “Yes. You won’t need to take me out on dates, or do any couple things that’ll take up too much valuable training time. I just need you to go along and not deny anything.”

“But, we won’t really be dating.”

“Yes, Ushijima.” You could tell he didn’t exactly like the idea. Maybe he wasn’t too happy about the deception. “You just said we’d have to meet up late in the evening if I’m going to teach you. Wouldn’t rumors just naturally spread on their own anyway? I just need you to  _ not  _ deny them. You wouldn’t even have to say or do anything.”

Ushijima thought it over. “And in exchange, you’ll teach me?”

“As often as you want.” You smiled.

You watched him mull it over. “Okay.” He finally said.

“We’ll have to call each other by our first names.” You said. Ushijima nodded.

“Let’s shake on it, Wakatoshi.” You said, your smile turned cunning. Ushijima reached out his hand, but instead of shaking it, you just held it and let your intertwined hands drop between the two of you. You knew, from the outside, it would just look something like hand-holding.

Naoko scribbled something on some scrap paper and handed it to Wakatoshi. “Here’s our numbers. You’ll have to get in touch.”

Ushijima let go and took the piece of paper. “Thank you.”

“No, thank  _ you _ , Ushijima.” Naoko said, before ushering you away.

“Oh, and you can’t tell anyone.” You added as you both left. Ushijima felt as though he’d just signed his soul to the devil.

* * *

“Are you insane?!” Naoko asked as you settled back inside the van.

“Don’t you think this is better?”

“How?! Do you know how much crap we’d have to deal with if it gets out that…” she turned to check that the partition to the driver was up. It was. “If it gets out that you two are just dating for publicity? It would hurt Ushijima too. Don’t you care about that?”

“I  _ said  _ just  _ let  _ the rumors spread. No confirming. No denying.”

“Why couldn’t you just find someone else to date? You’re not exactly desperate.”

“Don’t you think that would hurt more, Naoko? Finding out someone’s just dating you for publicity?” You turned to Naoko sharply. She should know better. She  _ must  _ remember.

“I’m sorry. I got carried away.”

“It’s fine.” You turned back to the window.

“Then why’d you ask Ushijima out at first?”

You turned back to Naoko. “Don’t you think he’s interesting?”

“If you’re into volleyball, I guess.” Naoko joked.

“He’s interesting!” You insisted. “I don’t know. He’s...honest. And when we met that first time...he didn’t ask for a selfie.” You laughed.

“Jeez. The standards are so low.”

“Whatever. He’s not…” you sighed, unwilling to continue, but too hard-headed to shut up. “He’s not like  _ him _ .”

“You’re right about that.” Naoko conceded.

* * *

“Ushijima!”

“Yes, coach.” Ushijima said as soon as he got back to practice.

“Unless it’s an emergency, you  _ do not  _ disrupt practice. Got that?”

“Yes, coach.” Ushijima nodded apologetically.

“Good. Diving drills. One set.” Ushijima nodded and was about to do just that when he heard his name.

“Ushijima!” Hoshiumi yelled indignantly. “What? Are you some kinda big shot now?”

“I did hear most athletes change once they get that big endorsement deal.” Romero added sheepishly.

“Who was that?” Kageyama asked, curious enough to join in.

“(Y/l/n) (Y/f/n)! You seriously don’t know?!” Hoshiumi again. He listed your film credits, all old kids’ movies. “She was the heroine of our childhoods!”

“She’s just modeling now, I think.” Ushijima said.

“Ah. Is she a friend?” Kageyama asked.

“I think so.” Ushijima said, and Kageyama only nodded before turning back to training.

“Hey, Ushijima, if she’s just a friend, then do you think I have a shot?” Hoshiumi smiled widely as he asked.

Ushijima thought carefully. Then looked at him seriously. “No.”

“What?!” Hoshiumi exclaimed. “Does she only like tall guys or something?! What is it?!”

“Ushijima! Hoshiumi!” Coach yelled, effectively ending the conversation. Just as well, Ushijima didn’t know how to answer him anyway. He was certainly not the best at reading people, but he found you especially confusing. You seemed sociable and were always surrounded by people, but there was something about you that felt like a secret. He didn’t think anyone had a shot at you at all.


	3. Chapter Three

“Come in!” You said, as Ushijima made his way into your condo. He accepted the slippers you handed him, slipping off his own shoes.

“Thanks for having me. I’m sorry it’s so late.” He said. You glanced at the clock, seeing it was 8pm.

“Oh, no problem.” The time hadn’t even registered to you. You’d been so busy. Though, having him over after dark was probably better for stirring rumors.

As Ushijima entered, he took in your carefully decorated living room. One wall featured movie posters, starring you at various ages. Another wall showed pictures of you with people he presumed were your co-stars, since they were also on the posters. Another wall was basically a trophy case.

“Mom.” You replied to his unasked question as he took in the space.

“Are you sure you’re not just psychic?”

“Wha-?” You paused, seeing the slightest smile on his face. “Wakatoshi, were you making a joke?” You smiled.

“Why does everyone ask that?” He was serious again.

“I’m sure everyone thinks you’re very serious and scary. You just have that kind of vibe.”

“Right, again.” Ushijima said.

“Okay, so I printed these out for you.” You handed Ushijima a stack of worksheets.

“I thought you were gonna teach me to predict volleyball plays?”

“Well, I’ve never really taught anyone before, but people always say the basics are important, right?” You asked.

“Of course. Fundamentals are always important.” Ushijima nodded.

“Right, ‘ _Fundamentals are the building blocks of fun_ ’.” You smiled up at him.

“What?”

“Mikhail Baryshnikov, an actor and one of the greatest ballet dancers ever.” Ushijima looked confused, so you followed it up. “I played a ballerina once, as a kid, and got crazy obsessed for a while.”

“This one?” Ushijima gestured to a movie poster on the wall. In it, you were posed in an elaborate tutu, looking much happier than he’d ever seen you.

“Yeah, but I started too old, and it was taking up too much of my auditioning and filming time, so my parents made me quit. It was for the best, I guess, since it’s not like I missed it too much after that.”

“You don’t look old at all.” Ushijima said.

“You’re an athlete. You know how it is. I was ten years old when I started, and that’s way too old to start training for a professional career in any athletic field. There were girls my age who were already at an international level.”

“I know someone who started volleyball in middle school, and he wasn’t very good then. I think he only started getting better in high school, because he had good teammates, and because he never gave up.”

You thought for a moment. “I think that’s the exception, and not the norm.” You watched his face, but his neutral expression stayed. “You’ve been playing all your life, though, right? Even your dad was a professional volleyball player, once?”

“Yes.” Ushijima nodded.

“Do you really love it?”

“There’s nothing in this world I’d rather be doing.” Ushijima smiled, small and genuine.

“That’s good.” You nodded, and just as Ushijima felt he was beginning to see you a little clearer, the invisible gate closed tight again. “Let’s work in the library.” You led him up a flight of stairs to a hallway.

“I’m sorry, but could I use your bathroom?”

“Oh, yeah,” you received the worksheets from him. “You can use the one in the guestroom. It’s down that way, the door on the left.”

Ushijima followed your instructions, but found the door locked. The knob jiggled uselessly in his hand. “Left!” Your sharp cry startled Ushijima. “Uh, the one on the left.”

“Oh, okay.” Ushijima flushed at his error.

* * *

“I don’t understand what this has to do with reading people.” Ushijima said. He was stationed at a study table while you watched a show on the large TV inexplicably placed in the library.

“They’re patterns. Also, they help you practice quick thinking.” You answered absently.

“I guess so, but these are shapes and numbers, not people.”

“Well, let me see what you have, so far.” You walked to the table and leaned over his shoulder. Ushijima noted your closeness, a distance few seemed willing to cross with him.

“I’m halfway through.”

“Hm. That’s not bad. You’re thorough and careful with your answers. I’m surprised.”

“What do you mean?” Ushijima turned to face you and you blushed at the proximity of him.

“I mean, you seem like a very...physically...inclined person. You don’t seem like the kind of person who would care about these things so much.”

“Well, if it’ll help me with volleyball.” Ushijima shrugged.

“Oh, right. You must really love volleyball, then.” You smiled and walked back to the couch. You sat back down, flopping onto the cushions.

“I do. This is my dream. All I’ve ever wanted is to be great at volleyball, and be a good teammate.”

“Lucky…” You mumbled absently.

“I worked very hard. Yes, I have the talent, but it was not all luck.” He turned his chair and frowned at you.

“Oh, I just meant you’re lucky to know what you want. Not everyone has that, you know.”

“Do you know what you want?”

“Not at all,” you said in a sing-song voice. “I have everything. What could I possibly want?”

“Don’t you have any dreams or ambitions?”

“Nope,” you looked him in the eye. “I have no dreams. My ambition is to take it easy as a mediocre model, coasting until my looks fade and nobody wants me anymore. Then I’ll fade into obscurity too, and just live off whatever I have saved. And then that’s it.”

“What about acting?”

“It was fun for a while.” You smiled stonily.

“It seems like you’re wasting a lot of your potential. You’re smart. You could pursue a lot of fields.”

“Why do I have to use my potential? Can’t I just do whatever I like, as long as I’m not hurting anyone?” You arched an eyebrow at him.

“You could use it to help someone.”

“I’m not trying to be ‘useful’, Wakatoshi. Why do I need to be ‘useful’? Is volleyball useful?” You snarled at him.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. Although, to answer that, I think volleyball is fun for people to watch, and that is one way to be useful.”

“If I’m not being useful, does that mean I’m useless?”

“That’s not what I meant. I’m sorry. I’m not...very good at expressing myself.” Confusion flashed across Ushijima’s face, brief but jarring. 

“It’s okay…” You stared at him, surprised and touched at his apology. “It’s my fault. I know that wasn’t what you meant. I was just...being defensive.”

“I think I meant...that it’s a sad thing, to not have a dream. I can’t even imagine it.” Ushijima watched for your reaction warily. You only nodded.

“I know. And it is. But sometimes that’s how it is, you know?” You shrugged and turned the TV off. “Dreams are...complicated.” You finished with an apologetic smile.

Ushijima nodded seriously. “Dreams are complicated.”

“You must think I’m so weird now.” You said. “I promise I’m not always like this, but...you’re surprisingly easy to talk to. It’s strange.”

That caught Ushijima off-guard. He looked at you with mild surprise and confusion. “People often tell me the opposite.”

“What?” You asked.

“They say I look intimidating, and cold. And that I come off as blunt.”

“Hm. I can see why some people might think that.” Ushijima frowned. “But I think it’s nice that you have some honest friends who can tell you that.”

“Yes, it’s helpful.” He said, smiling at the thought of his friends. Before high school, he hadn’t thought he was capable of having close friends. Even as a child, adults found him odd and other kids were scared of him.

“For the record, I think your honesty is refreshing, and I like that you do listen.”

“What do you mean?”

“This may be unbelievable to your pure and innocent heart, but there are some people out there who will only pretend to listen to you. They don’t actually care, or they’re thinking of how to use your words against you.”

Ushijima scoffed at ‘pure and innocent’. “I hope you never meet people like that.”

“Oh, it’s too late for me, but I hope you never meet people like that either.” As you said those words, you realized you meant it, all of it. What you didn’t know yet was that there was an old crack in your heart that was starting to heal again, an old wound waking up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the chapters have been so short! I'm just getting the ball rolling and setting stuff up (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) As always, please leave a review, thanks!


	4. Chapter Four

Ushijima got a text from you late in the morning the following day. It was a few screenshots of some tabloid photos and the resulting fanfare online. Without realizing it, he’d been photographed entering your building that night. This wasn’t his first brush with paparazzi, but he’d never get less creeped out. A few people were already speculating you two were dating, since there were also “rumors” you’d visited him during practice.

Fortunately, his teammates, coaches, and staff didn’t seem aware of the budding rumors spreading online. They did ask a few times about you, and he answered as honestly as he could. You were just friends.

* * *

“He’s here.” Naoko said, popping into your dressing room to deliver the news before disappearing outside again.

“Oh, good, let him in!” You yelled after Naoko.

“Who’s this?” Your makeup artist for the shoot asked. Ushijima entered, then, seeming too large for the small room, filled to the brim with the photoshoot’s wardrobe, and various hair and makeup equipment.

“Wakatoshi, this is Anna. She’s doing my makeup for the shoot. Anna, this is Ushijima Wakatoshi, a friend.” You gave Anna a calculatedly innocent look. You’d worked with Anna several times before, and she was excellent in her field, and fun to work with, but you two weren’t close enough for her to know about the fake-dating.

“I see,” Anna said, giving you a sly look. “Well, I’m just about done here. I’ll do a few touch-ups again before break’s over.” 

“You don’t have to go!” You gave her another, carefully calculated, shy look.

“No, no. It’s fine. Have fun!” She winked.

After Anna left, you turned to Ushijima. “Sorry you had to come so far so late.” You glanced at your phone. It was 9pm.

“It’s okay. I don’t have training tomorrow.” Ushijima said.

“Right, it’s the weekend. I forgot.” You noticed that Ushijima had not stopped staring at you. “You like Anna’s handiwork?” You smiled. This photoshoot was a lot more glamorous than the sportswear photoshoot you worked on with Ushijima. Your makeup was more flamboyant and colorful, designed to enhance the otherworldly aura of the outfits in the shoot. Though, at that moment, you were only in a robe.

“You look strange.” Ushijima said. You laughed.

“I know, right? It’s a lot, but it’s not the kind of look meant to be worn casually anyway. It’s for the concept.” You looked at the unfamiliar face in the mirror. “Besides, they’ll probably photoshop a lot anyway.”

“Oh, I noticed that in the campaign we worked on. I looked...different.” Ushijima frowned, looking for the right words. You remembered how he was new to all this. The work you did with him was so basic, that you barely even noticed the photoshopping anymore.

“Wait, check this out.” You scrolled through the photos on your phone. “This is probably the most I’ve been photoshopped. It’s hilarious.” You found the photo and showed him.

His eyes widened a fraction. “That’s supposed to be you?”

“I know, right?!” You said. “It was so bad that everyone totally noticed. It was a big thing online, for a bit.” Ushijima watched you grin, noticing how different your face was now to that night he first visited you in your home.

“You’re like a chameleon.” He said absently.

“I just have one of those faces, I guess. I can look however they want me to.” You scrolled some more through your phone. “This is probably how most of my fans see me anyway.” You showed him another photo. It looked natural enough, with only a little makeup, as far as he could tell.

“Is that photoshopped, too?” Ushijima asked in disbelief.

“Yup. And I had on a lot of makeup too. Rule of thumb, if it’s a professional photo, they’re probably wearing a lot of makeup.” You said, putting your phone away. “Oh! Lesson number two, I guess.”

“What do you mean?” Ushijima asked.

“Well, when predicting stuff,” you started. “Lesson number one, find the pattern. We did that last time. I guess, lesson number two is don’t trust your eyes.” You said.

“Right. Sometimes, someone looks like they’re about to spike the ball, but they actually just dink it.”

“Dink?” You asked, close to laughing.

“When a player just taps the ball over the net.”

“Oh, yeah, I saw that in one of the games you made me watch. That’s called a ‘dink’? Seriously?” You smiled at how silly it was and Ushijima couldn’t help but smile back.

“Yeah, what’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing. It’s adorable.” You mimed tapping a ball over a net. “ _ Dink. _ ” 

“If I can’t trust my eyes, then what should I trust?”

“Trust the pattern!” You said, smiling wide. “Some people mistake it for a gut instinct, or being psychic or whatever, but it’s just trusting the pattern.”

“I don’t get it.” Ushijima said, and you sighed and wracked your brain thinking of another way to explain.

“Okay, well, maybe it’s more of an experience thing? The more you practice reading patterns and predicting what comes next, the more adept you’ll be at trusting the pattern.”

Ushijima thought for a while. “I had a teammate in high school who was very good at reading patterns too. He was almost psychic, with his read blocking, but we had one opponent who learned to read him and was able to defeat us.”

“Huh. Sounds dramatic.” You said. “Is that why you want to learn? In case you ever face up against more opponents who are good at reading others?”

“That’s one reason.”

“What are the other reasons?”

“I...would like to be a good teammate.” Ushijima looked away, uncharacteristically shy.

“What do you mean?” You leaned forward without realizing.

“If I could read people better, or read situations better, I would be able to interact with my teammates better as well. Then, we’d also be a more unified force.”

“Oh my god, Wakatoshi.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Are you trying to be a good friend?” You smiled.

“That’s one way of saying it, I suppose.” Ushijima’s face was blank, as usual, but you could see the tips of his ears turn pink.

“That’s actually...so nice.” He turned a questioning look at you. Your glance was soft.

“Your teammates are lucky,” you said. “Anyone who puts this much effort into trying to understand another person is a good friend. So, they’re lucky to have you.”

“It’s the outcome that matters.” Ushijima insisted. “I’ll only be able to work well with them if I learn to communicate better. If not, this is all a waste.”

“Whatever you say,” you shrug. “But I don’t think trying to solve someone like a puzzle is the right way to be a good friend.” Ushijima looked confused.

“I’m still going to help you read patterns for volleyball. Don’t worry,” you held your hands up in concession.

“Five minutes!” Naoko said, sticking her head into the room. “You need to get into the sea foam dress and then come out for touch ups and let them see you.”

“Got it!” You said.

“Ushijima, if you don’t mind.” Naoko ushered him out before coming inside to help you with the elaborate outfit and accessories.

“Remember Kaoru’s invite for the party next week?” You said as you put everything on.

“Uh, yes. This time next week.” Naoko said.

“I’m going after all. You need to free up my schedule that evening.”

“Are you sure?” Naoko asked. She looked concerned.

“Yeah.” You nodded. “Don’t worry. It’ll be fine. I need to be more social, okay? I’ve been declining too many party invites.”

“Yes, but why now? What’s changed?”

“I’m bringing Wakatoshi.” You said. Before Naoko could comment, you stepped out of the room. Ushijima was still standing there, baffled at being kicked out so abruptly.

“(Y/n)...” He said. Your strange makeup suddenly made perfect sense with the ethereal dress and the sparkling accessories adorning your hair, neck, and wrists.

“How do I look?” You asked, wondering why you were suddenly shy. Ushijima realized he was gawking and shut his mouth.

“You look like a princess.” He said, giving you a small smile.

“See? You were right. I’m a chameleon.” You winked jokingly as staff members led you to set, careful of the dress.

Ushijima excused himself before your late night shoot could end. He approached you during a short break, wary of the flock of staff members fussing over you and your outfit. You held out your hand to balance yourself as you stepped out of the fragile high heels, and without a second thought, Ushijima took your hand to help you. You felt a familiar flutter in your stomach when he held your hand in his. He let go as soon as you were stable, and you wondered if he’d felt something too.

“I’m sorry, I have to go now. I didn’t realize you’d be working so late.” He said.

“No problem. I’m sorry you had to come out here so late. I know you said you don’t have much time outside of volleyball.”

“It’s okay,” he said, carefully considering how to put his feelings into words. “I had fun talking. You’re interesting.”

You noticed that many of the staff members who’d been fussing over you had moved away to give you two some privacy. The ones left behind to make important adjustments seemed pointedly quiet. Anna was definitely holding back a smile as she retouched your makeup.

“Um, there’s a party I’m going to, and I was hoping you could come with me,” you said, and when Ushijima looked like he was about to protest, you added: “I think it could be good experience.”

“What kind of party?” He asked.

“It’s very casual. It’s my friend’s dog’s birthday party.” You laughed. “You don’t have to do anything! I’ll even send you an outfit! And pick you up! It’s just something I have to do. I guess you could say it’s part of my job.”

“And it’ll be a learning experience for me?” Ushijima thought it over. You nodded.

* * *

It was around 3am when you found yourself at home and texting Ushijima. You figured he was probably asleep, but this was something you needed to say.

_ about that thing before. If you want an honest friendship, i dont think analyzing someone and responding accordingly is the way to go? It should be more natural _

You didn’t expect a reply, but you got one anyway.

_ Why are you awake?  _ Ushijima asked.

_ Sorry i woke u up _

You blinked at the text, suddenly feeling nervous and vulnerable.

_ Sorry im being weird  _ You texted before he could respond.

_ I’m a light sleeper.  _ Ushijima said. And then:  _ You don’t have to apologize. I don’t think you’re being weird. It’s true, it would be better to be able to communicate naturally with my teammates, but I often misinterpret them or say the wrong thing. _

_ I guess you just need more experience then  _

_ That’s why I’m going to that party with you, right? _

_ Yup  _ 😊 _ anyway i guess it’s nice of you to want to be a better friend. I hope these people are worth the effort _

_ I believe they are. _

You felt yourself flush imagining Ushijima’s straightforward expression as he typed out those words. Maybe he was the nicest person you’d ever met. You didn’t want to think about it. He made you feel inadequate, and clumsy, and strange, something you hadn’t felt in a long long time. He made your glamorous and decadent world look lazy and hollow. You didn’t know what to respond to that.

_ Now, what are you doing awake at 3AM?  _ Ushijima texted before you could think of something. You smiled to yourself. 

_ I’ll tell you some time, if we become better friends.  _ You don’t know what possessed you to send that text, but you did.

_ Does that mean we’re friends now? _

_ Of course wakatoshi! Now go back to sleep _

_ Goodnight, (y/n) _

_ Goodnight _

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave kudos and comments! :) Thank you!


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